Things I Learned...

I learned...

• that happiness begins within
• that there will always be that one person in your life who will never be happy with your success
• that life is what you make it
• that no matter how sorry you are for that one "bawal" stuff in your life, if you don't stop doing it, you were never really sorry
• that you can have all the friends in the world but only a few will stay true to you.
• that you can never trust anyone---not even the one you thought you could trust.
• you can only trust yourself and God---no matter what
• that I can forgive and forgive that one person who i trusted but betrayed my trust, over and over again...
• that a person has a limit...no matter how patient you are, when it is too much, then you can just say "i've had enough" and move on...
• that people change...
• that you won't really know a person no matter how long you've been friends
• that no one can make you upset, or treat you badly and unfairly without your permission,
• that i always have a choice whether to be affected or to not be affected by a certain person, situation or thing
• that Law of Attraction really works if you apply it in your life
• that prayer with faith+good deeds+positive outlook=answered prayer
• that there's truth to "we are where we're supposed to be"
• that Shifu of Kung Fu Panda was right when he said that "there are no accidents"
• that there is always a reason for everything and that we can only trust in God whether He shows us the reasons or not
• that no matter how painful things may get, or how things may seem, experiences were designed to help us grow and to help us learn,
• that I will never be done with lessons in life,
• that I will be posting more of those lessons next time :)

Year of the Animal

Amira: Ma...anong year of the animal ka?

Ako: Huh? Ano'ng year of the animal?...(thinks) ahh...Year of the horse ako anak. Si Miggy ROOSTER.

Amira: (turns to her Tito) eh ikaw Tito, anong year of the animal ka?

Tito: (turns to Tita) ano ba ako? PIG ba ako?

Tita: Di ko alam...ako RAT ako!

Lola: Ako nakalimutan ko na din...MONKEY ata ako eh...

Yaya: Ako TORTOL!

(Hay...)

Tamang Akala

At around 8PM, while downloading music for my new playlist, I felt my computer table move. So I paused for a while to make sure that I'm not imagining it. Then I also felt na parang yung chair ko and myself are moving na rin. I immediately jumped to the bed, ginising ko si Langga kasi nga nakatakot ako na lumilindol (yes...like a child, takot ako sa lindol). But of course, hindi naramdaman ni husband ang earthquake kasi nga naman he was asleep. As I was holding his hand, bumukas yung pinto kasi hinatid ni mommy si Miggy sa room dahil nakatulog na sa sala. I asked her kung naramdaman ba niya yung lindol, sabi naman niya wala naman daw siyang naramdaman. Since hindi pa rin ako kuntento, I rushed to my brother's room and asked him kung na-feel ba nila yung lindol, and he answered me, "Huuu...guni-guni mo lang yan...". So I didn't push the issue kasi nga naman ako lang ang nakaramdam. Mamaya nga naman, "akala ko lang".
Couple of hours later, my husband told me that there was indeed an earthquake. Buti na lang he searched through the net kung nagkaron nga ng lindol (maybe, para hindi magmukhang tanga ang Misis niya or out of curiosity lang talaga). Haay...it wasn't my guni-guni after all.

All About Our Love

Woke up to the glare of the light. You're up for another early morning flight. The room is so cold. The A/C's thermostat is set on TOO COLD since the kids can't sleep when it's warm. I tossed and turn, looking for something more than the thick blanket to cover me, but then I was still very cold.

And you're all set to go. You kissed each one of us, yet you leave that one very special kiss for me.

"My cab's here. I love you... Bye."
"I love you...Ingat."

And you're out the door. I tried to go back to sleep. Can't. Amira's awake for school, asks for her baon. Prepares to leave too.

Lucky cries. Cries for a bottle and a diapy change. Fed him and changed him.

Positioned myself to go back to sleep. The sun's starting to rise. I close my eyes and I felt cold again.
This time I took my cell.

"Langga, can't sleep. It's cold."
"Don't worry, I'll be home after lunch. I love you..."
"Ok. I'll see you later. I love you..."

Feeling a lot better. I took Miggy from his bed and brought him to ours.

"Miggy, don't pee on the bed ok?"
"Yes mommy".

And he wrapped his arms around my neck.
And I took my cell yet again.

"Langga... Miggy's here with me. The bed feels a lot more better.
The pillow's soft, and the room is cold. Sarap matulog! Too bad you had to go to work. :("
"Ihian pa unta ka ni Miggy! Bwahahahaha!"

Now that's the typical you. Your message brought a smile to my face. Had to control myself not to laugh. And everything falls into place. The sun is up.

"Langga...briefing na. I love you...I'll see you later."
"I love you more...Take care."

Settled between my two little boys, I close my eyes, and in peace, fell asleep.

It's all about our love. So shall it be forever, never ending.

After all this time. After all is said and done.

-Sade

My All Time Favorite

I'd Die Without You Is it my turn to wish you were lying here. I tend to dream you when I'm not sleeping. Is it my turn to fictionalize my world. Or even imagine your emotions. Tell myself anything... Is it my turn to hold you by your hands. Tell you I love you and you not hear me... Is it my turn to totally understand. To watch you walk out of my life and not do a damn thing... (Chorus) If I have to give away... The feeling that I feel. [ Find more Lyrics at www.mp3lyrics.org/ajH ] If I have to sacrifice... Oh, whatever babe, whatever baby. If I have to take apart... All that I am... Is there anything that I would not do, since I'd die without you... Yeah baby since I'd die without you... since I'd die without you... Oh, I apologize for all the things I've done. But now I'm underwater and I'm drowning... Is it my turn to be the one to cry. Isn't it amazing how some things completely turn around... So take every little piece of my heart... Yeah, take every little piece of my soul... Yeah, take every little piece of my mind... 'Cause if you're gone... inside... I'd die without you...

What About Death

Few days ago...I found myself thinking about death. Morbid, i know. Maybe I was only hormonal, or maybe I'm just too idle that even the subject of death crossed my mind.

I began thinking...what happens when we die? What happens to you when you can't feel anything anymore. Will it be painful when you can feel nothing at all? Sounds crazy right? It even makes me think if the whole body and soul thing is true. And if everlasting life is really that--ever lasting.

Ok...i know I sound silly already. Just one of my gruesome thoughts. Hmm.

For Omar, Mira and Miggy...
another day means... another day closer to my dreams,
another day means...another day closer to my whims,
another day means...another day closer to hearing my children scream
and another day means another day closer to what may seem.
another day means...another day closer to things to come,
and another day means another day closer to my lover's arms.
another day brings yet another day to look forward to,
when another day means another day closer to being with you.


**Originally posted Monday, 10 April 2006 in Weblogs, Friendster.

On Airsoft Games

" Strength does not come from physical capacity, but from an indomitable will" - Mahatma Gandhi
I never thought I would learn to love Airsoft games. I never thought that it would be one of the many reasons that would make me get up on a Saturday morning aside from Miggy's wet kisses or Amira's wet sheets. I never really stayed on a sports long enough to like it, but now I can tell that this new hobby is something that I'll enjoy for a long time. I am not a very athletic person. I am asthmatic. I move according to my pace and my time. But one thing I discovered, as long as I'm into something, and I enjoy and love what I'm doing, I can run as fast as I can, I can endure pain, I can overcome claustrophobia (at least, from wearing a full-faced mask) and I can learn how to move around a man's world.
Before, when Omar, my husband, used to play Airsoft three years ago, I resent it so much since I felt that Amira and I have to share his time with the game. I felt that the game is stealing his time with us. Now, looking back, i realized that we as persons have to set some time to discover ourselves as individuals, to learn new things, learn what we could be, what we could like and love so we could share a part of ourselves to people we love. I realized that there are certain times in our lives where we need to explore and find out what else is there that the world can offer, for us to offer more of ourselves to our loved ones. So if there's anything that you want to try, or would like to do, something adventurous, or maybe something you're just not used to doing---just about anything, and you felt that you're enjoying it, hold on to it, move on with it. As long as it makes you happy, believe in your capacity to do it, that you can make it, no matter what your limitations are, as long as you believe that you can, as long as you TRY.

** Originally posted Tuesday, 13 February 2007 in Sports, Friendster blogs.

I don't know what came up to me, but i just felt that i needed to share what's going on in my mind and in my heart lately. I just feel SOOO BLESSED and i thought of counting my blessings my way of thanking the Lord for all that He has given me."I must have done something good", I thought. The problems I've had, the tears i have shed, and the pain(s) I've been through in the past, can't measure up to the greatness of God's graces. Some people may have made me believe that my marriage is a mistake and that it " wouldn't work" since Omar and I married young (and very much in love). The problems we've had (and will have in the future) as a couple are seen by some people as a reason not to stay together anymore. There was even one person who said, "What's not meant to be is not really meant to be" (very pessimistic indeed). But as I think about what she said, I realized that Omar and I married for all the right reasons. What more reason can one have to get married but when you're in love, right? =)

Omar and I have been together for 7 years already (and still counting...). We've had our share of ups and downs, heaven and hell, and maybe even purgatory. BUT WE'RE STILL VERY MUCH TOGETHER =). We may fight every day about petty things, but at the end of the day, he still can't stand not saying "i love you" to me. Yesterday, as we were having our 'bonding talk', I asked him, "What do you like about US?", and he answered, "The way we 'click' and US together". God is really on our side. He has never allowed us to drift emotionally from each other despite those times that our problems may have pushed us to the edge. Some elements may have tried to create a rift between us, but it has even made our relationship stronger. (my number 1 blessing and more to go!)

So still on with the counting...I have three adorable and beautiful kids, Amira, Miggy and Mavy (a.k.a. Lucky). They are so talented and so amazing that sometimes I can't help but ask, "Are you guys really MINE?" (*teehee*).

I have friends who are true and can be trusted, and who arestill standing by me all through the years! No politics, no jealousy, no insecurities. I feel a hundred times lucky to have them. Even if we're not together, the distance didn't make any difference. They are still the truest friends one can have. I salute you guys! You are God's gift to me. =) (Daphne, Khristin, Jaja, Annabelle, Amorille, B-Ann, Jamaika,...and the rest of the best!)* My family...they may not be perfect, but they love me and they are supportive of the things i do and they are indeed one part of me that I can't live without. The values I grew up with, my faith, my relationship with the Lord, the people who molded me into the person i am now (my Mom, my Mamang, my Mommy Gie and Daddy Ver, my Tita Babes and my Tito Tata)...are bonuses I want to thank God for. So for all the blessings received (coz there's more to thank for) and yet to be received, I thank you Lord for them.

To God be the Glory!

*space limited. =)

NOTE TAKING IN THE LAND DOWN UNDER

A couple of weeks ago* Omar and I went to Sydney. The trip was kind of "bitin" since we only had a few days to go around the city and to bond with our friends Jong and Betsy. Yet, the whole trip in general was one of the best trips I've ever had.
Sydney, the capital of the state New South Wales in Australia, is notable for its beaches and its twin tourist spots the Harbour Bridge and the Sydney Opera House. It is also sometimes called the "Harbour City" since it is built around Port Jackson which includes Sydney Harbour.
The famous Sydney Opera House, which was designed by Jørn Utzon, is where major performances such as ballets and musical productions are conducted. Because of its very enthralling architecture, it has become Sydney's symbol. We were so fascinated with its structure that we took lots of photos with it as a background.
The Harbour Bridge on the other hand, which is just across the Sydney Opera House, is also one of Sydney's icon. As I just discovered it is also known as the "coathanger". I guess I don't have to explain why...
The Circular Quay, which is located between the Sydney Opera House and the Harbour Bridge, is your typical meeting place. Around it you'll see ferries, train station, and a tram station as well.
So after our sightseeing at the Circular Quay, we walked going to Darling Harbour. Darling Harbour is a large recreational district. This is where you'll find the Sydney Aquarium, the largest IMAX Theatre in the world, the Wildlife World, and Paddy's Market among others.
After this stop we took the monorail going to The Rocks where we had a taste of authentic Australian beer at the Lowenbrau Keller.

Just look at Omar's mug, that's actually a one liter mug of diesel (bier and cola mix), compared to our 500 ml. =)
It was such a fabulous day for the four of us. The walk was long but we had fun. We went from places to places. The city mesmerized me. Never mind if it is considered one of the top expensive cities (or country) in the world...(the exchange rate of a dollar goes from .8-1.39 cents!). The whole experience was just so great I can't wait for our next trip back to Sydney! We owe it to Jongot--thanks for the tour! =)

* This was actually posted on Sunday, 26 August 2007 in Travel, at Friendster blogs but since I decided to delete that blog account, I am reposting my entries here. =)